Archive for the ‘ My Top 10 ’ Category

Ups & Downs

This is how I can describe the first month since I am Back. A lot of downs and eventually some jump up, a dive into the good side of life here.

I am sick of it all sometimes. I am sick of all that miserie I have to bear and clean. I am sick of seeing and people trying to exploid others in any way possible. I am sick of those who are so selfish that can’t put themselves into your shoes, despite they were there not long ago.

In one moment I laugh and everything is perfect, and then one word or the lack of it can push me into a dark corner of my mind and keep me there for hours. When being there, feeling pitty for myself, I feel so comforting and safe .

Sometimes I get stuck inthere, and I feel there is no one to drag me out of it. No one really to rely on, to find comfort and a warm hug. No one can fell me, recognize in my look  my fears and worries. I am alone. Among so many people. And that is a sad thought that makes me burst into tears often.

I feel like a lost child in a crowded amuzement park full with screaming kids, annoyed parents and repulsingly looking clowns. It’s dark, and the few blinding lights from the rides are making it hard to find the exit. It’s a mad world. And there is no one who can or want to help. No one who cares. They just smile and pass by. Not their problem after all, right?!

[Chorus – Rihanna]
Just gonna stand there and watch me burn
Well that’s alright because I like the way it hurts
Just gonna stand there and hear my cry
Well that’s alright because I love the way you lie
Love the way you lie

[Verse 1 – Eminem]
I can’t tell you what it really is
I can only tell you what it feels like
And right now there’s a steel knife in my windpipe
I can’t breathe but I still fight all I can fight
As long as the wrong feels right it’s like I’m in flight

High off on love, drunk from my hate
It’s like I’m huffin’ paint and I love it
The more I suffer, I suffocate
Right before I’m about to drown, she resuscitates
Me, she f**kin’ hates me, and I love it, Wait!
Where you going? I’m leaving you.
No you ain’t. Come back. We’re running right back

Here we go again, it’s so insane
Cuz when it’s going good, it’s going great
I’m Superman with the wind in his back
She’s Louis Lane and when its bad, it’s awful
I feel so ashamed, I snap “Who’s that dude?”
I don’t even know his name
I laid hands on her, I’ll never stood so low again
I guess I don’t know my own strength

[Chorus – Rihanna]
Just gonna stand there and watch me burn
Well that’s alright because I like the way it hurts
Just gonna stand there and hear my cry
Well that’s alright because I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

[Verse 2 – Eminem]
You ever love somebody so much,
you could barely breathe when you with ’em?
You meet, and neither one of you even know it hit ’em
Got that warm fuzzy feeling, yeah them chills you still get ’em
Now you gettin’ f**kin’ sick of lookin’ at ’em
You swore you’d never hit ’em, never do nothing to hurt ’em
Now you’re in each other’s face spewing venom in your words when you spit ’em
You push, pull each other’s hair, scratch, claw, bit ’em
Throw ’em down, pin ’em, so lost in the moments when you’re in ’em

It’s the rage that took over it controls you both <<
So they say it’s best to go your separate ways
Guess that they don’t know ya cuz today,
That was yesterday, yesterday is over and it’s a different day
Sound like broken records playing over
But you promised her, next time you’d show restraint
You don’t get another chance
Life is no nintendo game, but you lied again
Now you get to watch her leave out the window
Guess that’s why they call it “window pane”

[Chorus – Rihanna]
Just gonna stand there and watch me burn
Well that’s alright because I like the way it hurts
Just gonna stand there and hear my cry
Well that’s alright because I love the way you lie
musicjuzz.blogspot.com
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

[Verse 3 – Eminem]
Now I know we said things, did things that we didn’t mean
And we fall back into the same patterns, same routines
But your temper’s just as bad as mine is
You’re the same as me
When it comes to love you’re just as blinded

Baby please come back, it wasn’t you. Baby it was me.
Maybe our relationship isn’t as crazy as it seems
Maybe that’s what happens when a tornado meets a volcano
All I know is I love you too much, to walk away now
Come inside, pick up your bags off the sidewalk
Don’t you hear sincerity in my voice when I talk?
I told you this is my fault, look me in the eyeball
Next time I’m pissed, I’ll aim my fist at the drywall
Next time? There won’t be no next time
I apologize, even though I know it’s lies
I’m tired of the games, I just want her back. I know I’m a liar
If she ever tries to f**kin’ leave again,
Ima tie her to the bed and set this house on fire
Just gonna

[Chorus – Rihanna]
Just gonna stand there and watch me burn
Well that’s alright because I like the way it hurts
Just gonna stand there and hear my cry
Well that’s alright because I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

U2 – With or Without You

A song by U2 from 1987.

Sounds as the mid 90’s to me, but what do I know?! (except the fact that Bono was HoT back then ;))

Enjoy it, one of their greatest songs for sure!

See the stone set in your eyes
See the thorn twist in your side.
I wait for you.
Sleight of hand and twist of fate
On a bed of nails she makes me wait
And I wait without you

With or without you
With or without you.

Through the storm, we reach the shore
You gave it all but I want more
And I’m waiting for you

With or without you
With or without you.
I can’t live with or without you.

And you give yourself away
And you give yourself away
And you give, and you give
And you give yourself away.

My hands are tied, my body bruised
She´s got me with nothing to win
And nothing left to lose.

And you give yourself away
And you give yourself away
And you give, and you give
And you give yourself away.

With or without you
With or without you
I can’t live
With or without you.

With or without you
With or without you
I can’t live
With or without you
With or without you.

Sia – My Love

Early in the morning, late at night, everywhere, any time, this song is with me constantly..

If I don’t listen to it, I sing in my mind. When next track starts, I just press Previous..

Obsessed all over again. Can’t resist it.

I can only wish myself one such song every day and I will be a happy woman!

And when I ask myself if I feel happy now, I feel the urge to scream “YES!” (long-sigh-of-relief ;))

I feel good, insecure, somewhat unprepared, excited, impatient. With a hint for what is about to happen, a memory from what already did and with the desire for more , I wait to see what tomorrow will bring.

I’ve always liked the idea of the American proverb “Today is the first day of the rest of your life“. Starting – next Monday!

Am I ready for it?! Most probably not. Will I enjoy every second of it? You can bet I will!

Especially with such good music in the background.

My love, leave yourself behind
Beat inside me, leave you blind
My love, you have found peace
You were searching for release

You gave it all, into the call
You took a chance and
You took a fall for us

You came thoughtfully, loved me faithfully
You taught me honor, you did it for me

Tonight you will sleep for good
You will wait for me my love

Now I am strong (Now I am strong)
You gave me all
You gave all you had and now I am home

My love, leave yourself behind
Beat inside me, leave you blind
My love, look what you can do
I am mending, I’ll be with you

You took my hand added a plan
You gave me your heart
I asked you to dance with me

You loved honestly
Did what you could release
Aaaahhh oooh

I know you’re pleased to go
I won’t relieve this love

Now I am strong (Now I am strong)
You gave me all
You gave all you had and now I am home

My love, leave yourself behind
Beat inside me, I’ll be with you
oooooohh ooooh
Du du du ooooooh

Back, but not for too long & Sparklehorse – Sea of Teeth

В България съм отново, във ваканция след успешно взети изпити. Не бях писала скоро в Отдушника си и тази вечер нахвърлях някакви неща, които ми се въртят в главата тези дни. Иска ми се да ги споделя и тук…

“06.07.2010

18:44

И ето ме от България, седнала на земята, както обичам да правя, с лаптоп на леглото, възглавница в скута и като background – току що изтегления саундтрак на филма, който гледах досега – Remember me с Робърт Патисън.

Не знам какво да пиша. Изпитите минаха, имам 7, 12, 7. Прибрах се успешно, майка се опита да поплаче на летището, но аз я разсеях и прекъснах с ‘Хайде стига, къде са ми черешите?! 😉

Още на следващия ден изфучахме от вкъщи рано рано по задачи и срещи с приятели.

Още от първия ден искам да се върна обратно…. не ми се остава тук.

Искам Mr. X, искам си работата в клуба, искам си квартирата в Бирк, всичко си искам…

И толкова дълго време ще остана тук, че се опасявам, че отново ще свикна и накрая няма да ми се прибира…;(

Онзи ден Mr. X ми прати мейл във фейсбук, отговорих му, а после си говорихме в скайп. Разни дългосрочни планове се въртят в тази моя главица, а съм си обещала такива неща повече не! В някои отношения е по-добре да се оставиш на течението, а не да предвиждаш и плануваш всеки следващ миг.

И колкото и да ми говори Mr. X как иска да пътуваме някъде през ваканцията след първия семестър (януари 2011?!), аз толкова далеч в бъдещето отказвам да гледам!

И се наслаждавам на моментите сега. Жалко, че него го няма в тях.

Което ми напомня, че трябва да му направя клипче с гледката от прозореца ми. Продължавам да се удивявам на кофти пътищата, сгради, въобще типична българска градска среда (как бързо се отвиква….) и само се подсмихвам и си мисля как на всеки ъгъл той би казал нещо от сорта на „This is so illegal”…

Мисля си как нямаме бъдеще с него и се чудя понякога, гледайки отстрани на всичко – защо продължавам да съм с него, при пложение, че “трябва да търся нещо сериозно…” както му е казвано напоследък.

Но след такъв филм, в който героят живееше за мига, безотговорно, правеше всичко, без да мисли какви последствия ще има за бъдещето му и накрая умря в една от кулите близнаци на 11.09.2001, всичко изглежда някак безсмислено. Това ‘търсене на нещо сериозно’ приемам по-скоро като пропиляно време, в което съм можела да правя това, което искам, а не това което се очаква.

Затова сега ще се наслаждавам на всяка секунда тук, сама в Бг, и после, евентуално с Mr.  X в Дания. Ако не с него, дори и сама, ще живея за мига, ще се радвам на всичко, от което повечето се оплакват.

Ще се смея, ще плача, ще припадам от смях, ще лудувам, ще сияя с усмивката си, ще се радвам на рядко появяващото се слънце в Дания, ще правя всичко всичко, докато мога

Следващата песен от саундртака започна с думите ‘Can you feel the wind…’

Искам да усещам вятъра и да затварям очи всеки път, когато съм навън, да чувствам всяка секунда като нещо специално, защото е!

Искам да вдишвам живот и да издишвам щастие и задоволство. От вятъра, от живота, от студа, от жегата, от слънцето, от морето, от бриза на брега, от музиката в ушите ми.

Искам да съм постоянно обградена от стойностна, наелектрезирваща музика, която да ме кара да казвам и пиша неща в моменти, в които нямам какво да кажа. Като сега.”

——————————————————————-

Ето я и песента, която споменах по-горе…

Can you feel the wind of venus on your skin?

Can you taste the crush of a sunset’s dying blush?

Stars will always hand in summer’s bleeding veils

Can you feel the rings of saturn on your finger?

Can you taste the ghosts who shed their creaking hosts?

But seas forever boil, trees will turn to soil

Stars will always hand in summer’s bleeding veils

But seas forever boil, trees will turn to soil

The Temper Trap – Love Lost

Extremely good and refreshing video! 😉

Our love was lost
And now we found, it
Our love was lost
And hope was gone

Our love was lost
But now we found, it
And if you flash your heart
I won’t deny it

I promise
(I promise)

Your walls that run
To cold to touch, yeah
Your walls I rub
To hard to climb

I know its hard
But I can still hear it beating
So if you flash your heart
I won’t mistreat it

I promise
(I promise)
(I promise)

Our, love, was lost
In the rumor around the things
You, You’ve been dreaming of
Keep me in mind
When your ready
I am here
To take you every-time

Our love was lost
Lost
Lost
Lost
Lost
Lost
Lost
Lost
Our love was lost
But now it’s found

My Lucky Number 7 [EN]

After being dared by my favorite Morko in a post of his, I decided to prove once again that I have an excellent music taste.

I will do that by creating a special list putting a lot of efforts and a spoon of good memories in its creation. An extraordinary and precious list containing the seven albums I would take on a desert island with me

it is important to keep in mind that you should not just include your favorites for the moment, but music that has passed the test of time and that you could listen to for at least another 10 years…

Now that is what I call a ‘tough job‘.. so many great artists, albums and song.. How the hell can I restrict myself to only 7 albums?! Only if they were albums which I created myself during the years, playlists from my MP3-Player or some total favorites for life… But No, rules are rules, have to be followed..

It was still a great pleasure and even an honor to select My Lucky Number 7.. I made that choice rather quickly, without having second thoughts or reconsidering my choice. Who knows, that may lead to some corrections in time..:)

(That was what I wrote more than 2 years ago, but now when I decided to translate the article, I still feel the same way, just can add some extra albums like most by Coldplay, Greg Laswell etc., but definitely cannot remove anyone of those stated beneath…;))

So here they are – My Top 7 Albums, which I would take with me on a desert island, my 7 little music treasures:

1) Madonna – Ray of light

ray_of_light-1.jpg

All the best by Madonna gathered in one – this is what this album represents for me.. I cannot chose one single song that I favorite the most.. Ray of Light, Nothing Really Matters, The Power of Good-bye, Drowned world (Substitute for love), Frozen, Candy Perfumed girl, Little star, Mer Girl…. simply Madonna ..

2) Ace of base – The Bridge

ace-of-base.jpg

Ever since I was a short, skinny, approximately 10-years-old girl, I was singing their song all the time in my room, knowing by heart every single one from this album. I had and played that tape millions of times, with and without any special reason. I was so obsessed, that I put a poster of the album cover on my door… I was so crazy about them.. 😉

  1. Beautiful Life
  2. Never Gonna Say I’m Sorry
  3. Lucky Love (Original Version)
  4. Edge of Heaven
  5. Strange Ways
  6. Ravine
  7. Perfect World
  8. Angel Eyes
  9. Whispers In Blindness
  10. My Déjà Vu
  11. You and I
  12. Wave Wet Sand
  13. Que Sera
  14. Just ‘N’ Image
  15. Lucky Love (Acoustic Version)”
  16. Experience Pearls
  17. Blooming 18

3) Chicane – Behind the Sun

When I was younger, back at the time when I still didn’t have my favorite MP3-Player (which I feel naked without right now), I was playing Chicane on my stereo and was falling asleep under the sounds of Offshore and Saltwater now those were some sweet dreams :))

chicane-behind-the-sun.jpg080_behind_the_sun.jpg

4) Madonna – Music

A little more different sound by Madonna. My favorites are What it feels like for a girl, Beautiful Stranger, American Pie, Music and Don’t tell Me.

madonna.jpg

5) City of Angels OST

I downloaded the soundtrack of the ‘City of Angels’ movie after watching it for dozen times and they all immediately became unbreakable part of my MP3-Player and of my Total Favorites for Life Folder… Those are Alanis Morisette – Uninvited, Goo Goo Dolls – Iris, U2 – If God Will Send His Angels, Sarah McLachlan – Angel, Paula Cole – Feelin’ Love. I also have to mention Gabriel Yared, who has 4 unforgettable tracks in it…

city_of_angels.jpg

6) Cafe del Mar Vol.5 (1998)

I was hesitating between few volumes of Cafe del mar, but Vol.5 from ’98 is definitely outstanding among all with its obvious uniqueness and different sound. Attention deserve most tracks like Mumbai Theme Tune, More Than Ever People, Appreciation (Radio Mix), Tout Est Bleu (Original Ame Strong S.A. Remix), Talking With Myself ’98 (Canny Remix) !!! and most of all Close Cover by Wim Mertens!

Simply Inspiring!

cafe_del_mar_vol5.jpg

7) Enigma – Love Sensuality Devotion – Greatest Hits

Last but not least, this album by my favorite Enigma I will leave without a comment, because I had already said what it means to me in another article (only in BG unfortunately).

enigma.jpg

Beastie Boys – Body Movin (Fatboy Slim Remix)

“Ready one, you will do this four times with the left
four with the right then eight times with both, then repeat”

Ah..clap your hands..

Body movin’ body movin’
A1 sound in the town so soothing
Body movin’ body movin’
We be getting down and you know we’re crush groovin’

Now let me get some action from the back section
We need body rockin’ not perfection
Let your back bone flip but don’t slip a disc
And let your spine unwind just take a risk
I wanna’ do the freak until the break of dawn
Tell me party people is that so wrong
The ship is docking inter-lockin
And up-rockin’ electro-shocking
We’re getting down computer action
Do the robotic satisfaction
Now all of y’all ah get off the wall
Have a ball and get involved with

Body movin’ body movin’
A1 sound’ sound so soothing
Body movin’ body movin’
We be getting down and you know we’re crush groovin’

“Stand erect, arms down. Swing left arm big same with the right”

Flame on, I’m gone
I’m so sweet like a nice bon bon
Came out rapping when I was born
Mom said rock it ’til the break of dawn
Puttin bodies in motion ’cause I got the notion
Well like Roy Cormier with the coconut lotion
The sound of the music makin’ you insane
You can’t explain to people this type of mind frame
And like a bottle of Chateau Neuf Du Pap
I’m fine like wine when I start to rap
We need body rockin’ not perfection
Let me get some action from the back section

Body movin’ body movin’
A1 sound in the town so soothing
Body movin’ body movin’
We be getting down and you know we’re crush groovin’

“Left arm ready and one, and again, stand erect”

Mike D huhaa with the master plan
I said ooh my my and thank you ma’am
And when I grab the mic you scream ooh, uh, excuse me
The creme de la creme is who I am
MCA where have you been
Packed like sardines in the tin..tin
So kick off your shoes and put on your swim fins
‘Cause when it comes to quarries I’m known to swim
And Adrock light up the place
And if you pull my card you pull the ace
And if you ask me turn up the bass
And if you play defender I could be your hyper space so

Body movin’ body movin’
A1 sound in the town so soothing
Body movin’ body movin’
We be getting down and you know we’re crush groovin’

“You will do eight hops on the left, eight on the right
Four left four right, two left, two right, the one each
Left right, left right. Start and land on the balls of the feet
Left foot, ready it’s one two three four five”